My personal good luck was born out of terrible luck for
my university.  The Polish government
changed its legislation regarding funding to non profits and stuck it to our ovaries.  Big. 
Because our program isn’t regional, because we gather our students from
all across the nation, we have oh, about, zero złoty from November to April.  Our
program supports from a dozen to two dozen students who don’t have to pay a single
grosz to come to school here, to live in our schoolhouse, to eat three meals a
day.  Our target student population comes
from villages and small towns, particularly ones that used to be communist
state farms and now have 80-100% unemployment rates.  We bring them in, and if they pop out at the
end of nine months (instead of deserting in the middle, which happens once in a
while), their dreams seem to be bigger, more accessible, and most of them go on
to continue their higher education.

So there were
two catastrophes awaiting me when I stepped off the plane in Warsaw.  The first: no money.  I still don’t understand how they’re going to
support us all this year.  I’m a little
worried about the food thing—these kids like to eat.  The second: I have no new students.  The problem is a lot of our pool of potential
candidates are going off to work in other European countries now, because they
can earn a lot of money in a short amount of time (weak Polish złoty).  And apparently, we’re just really terrible at
recruiting students.  Ok, so I have one new
student.  I had two but one of them ran
off; he decided he couldn’t cut it here. 

No students in
Teremiski means no funding for Teremiski, which means no funding for Warsaw,
which means no second year in Warsaw.  So
most of my students from last year have returned to Teremiski.

I feel guilty
for being happy (happy, finally, after all the dramatic bullshit over the past
three weeks, which is still raging on, actually; I’ve just decided to become
oblivious to it.)  Emma, one of my
besties, has moved here to Teremiski. 
She was earmarked for the second year program in Warsaw, but because we
had to shut down that branch this year, she’s come here.  We’re rooming together, and I can’t get any
work done because we keep talking and laughing. 
I haven’t been this giddy in ages;  I was laughing so hard and giggling so much
all evening (Emma just arrived today to the village) that I have to stop myself
and say sternly, in my head, "Lauren, CALM THE FUCK DOWN."  Natalie, one of my students, reproached me
for "glowing"; her best friend from last year, my student, Monia, decided,
finally, not to return.

Man, it’s like—I’m
all for the growth and self understanding and hardship overcoming that comes
from being in a foreign country alone, but to be honest, I’m not all that
jazzed about solo travel.  Living here
isn’t exactly solo travel, but there’s still the same sense of alienation and
loneliness.  I want to be able to share experiences
with somebody who understands me the way...well, the way only a handful of
people in the world possibly can.  I
simply can’t believe that somebody who knows me so well, who reflects me so
well, and who brings out the best in me, is going to be working, playing, and
traveling with me for the next year. Be gone loneliness, alienation and
friendsickness!

My only worry
is that we’ll hate each other by the dead of winter.  It happens here.  The big schoolhouse suddenly becomes a small
dollhouse; we’re all trapped inside because the abominable snowman outside is
threatening to eat our noses and ears and toes (and yet Yogi bikes to work to
Białowieża everyday, even in the deadest of winters, this is the superhuman I’m
going to Asia with!); we just want some goddamn sun and can’t stand another
minute with each other.

It’s going to
be a difficult and intensive year, for sure; we’re preparing the students for
their Maturas (equivalent of S.A.T.’s/A.C.T.’s) and they’re cramming years of
study into six months.  But I feel such a
burden is lifted, with someone I love at my side, and super-bonus, since I don’t
have to break in a whole new set of students.