1. “Roads? Where we’re going, we don’t need ... roads.”

2. You receive food that in no way resembles the dish you ordered, and you don’t care.

3. You’ve seen the sun rise on every continent.

4. You’ve seen the sun set on each ocean.

5. You have to get a new passport because the consulate cannot add any more pages.

6. You’ve been to at least 5 countries that do NOT have Starbucks, KFC, Pizza Hut or McDonalds.

7. You’ve entered more than one country without the required visa.

8. You realize which football your company is speaking of. You don’t need some twit from Bow with thick black-rimmed glasses to say, “At’s wot ya Yanks cull Soccah.”

9. You know what a Rebab is.

10. When given the option of taking a taxi, tram, metro, bus, trolley bus, or walking five kilometers, you walk.

11. You appreciate the importance of socks and boots.

12. You can discern the caliber of the automatic being fired across the border, town, street or hall.

13. You’ve challenged a 'Pints of Guinness Drank in One Night' record at a pub somewhere in Ireland.

14. You’ve been to Carnival on each continent.

15. You’ve climbed a mountain on five continents over 3500m.

16. You’ve swum in the Caspian Sea.

17. You know the difference between Churrusco, Chorizo and Churro, and have eaten each in their native land.

18. Waking with ice in your beard, in doors, doesn’t seem odd anymore.

19. You’ve smoked Afghanistan’s finest hashish…on four-thousand-year-old holy ground…with AK-47 touting police officers …and ashed into a one-thousand-year-old ashtray….

20. You’ve started your own business in a foreign nation.

21. You begin relishing 25-hour flights one way. It means a lot of free wine.

22. You’ve been to a super volcano.

23. Train, plane or bus journeys under 12 hours seem short.

24. You’ve been in a local newspaper simply because you are a foreigner.

25. You like Moscow.

26. You drink your tea as it is served, no questions asked.

27. You start gawking at people in your home country, vis-a-vi the way people gawk at you in the third world.

28. You learn that cycling is one of the best ways to see Iran.

29. Menus? They only complicate matters.

30. You never carry a guidebook.

31. When someone asks you, “Where you from, Mister?” you reply the ICR (I can’t remember).

32. You know the difference between knedlicky, dumplings, momos, dim sum, pelmayni, ravioli, pot stickers, wantons, gyoze, samosas and perogis.

33. KFC is not the safe option.

34. You’ve felt the difference between typhoid and food poisoning.

35. You no longer wait for a break in traffic. You just walk through, Frogger style.

36. The best beaches are the ones with only you on them.

37. You drink local water.

38. You’ve sailed across at least one ocean.

39. You’ve killed and prepared more than one of your meals.

40. You know the difference between a shwaruma, doner kebab, kebab, sheikh kebab, shashlik and satay.

41. You try everything twice. Just incase something went wrong the first time.

42. You instinctively know which dark street to walk down and which not too.

43. You no longer fear being mugged. It’s only money.

44. You’ve had a passport issued in more than one foreign nation.

45. You’ve experienced –40°C and +40°C in the same month.

46. You’ve been to at least 3 nations that end in –stan.

47. You realize that a hamburger, taco, doner kebab, steak baguette and sausage roll are basically the same thing.

48. You have to really search for things to surprise you.

49. You can easily live on $1 per day.

50. You can say ‘Hello,’ ‘Goodbye,’ and ‘Thank you’ in at least 15 languages.

51. You eat what is placed in front of you, regardless of dietetics.

52. You’ve seen the Gobi covered in snow.

53. You have your passport details memorized.

54. When filling in immigration forms, you have a race with whomever you are traveling with.

55. You’ve purchased more one-way tickets than roundtrip.

56. You’ve walked over more than one border.

57. You pack less for a nine-month journey than most pack for a weekend away.

58. You can fit everything you need for a weekend in your pockets.

59. You don’t use traveler’s checks.

60. You can find a bed at any hour.

61. You’ve lost count of how many beds you’ve slept in.

62. You’ve made your own path through a jungle.

63. You obtain your visas en route.

64. You know where the best bars are in all the world’s major airports.

65. After some voyages a $12 beer is worth every last sup.

66. You’ve eaten camel, yak, dog, rat, boar’s brain and 'meat'.

67. When seeing a cow’s head cracked open with an axe, you get really hungry for a steak.

68. You’ve had to walk over or past more than one dead body.

69. You realize that there is no truth in the news and no news in the truth.

70. You also realize that little else matters besides the rotation of the Earth.

71. Then you realize how small Britain really is.

72. You’ve been to all the former republics of the USSR.

73. A sliver of soap at a lavatory sink brings a smile to your face.

74. You choose the squat toilet over the sitter.

75. You’ve trekked Antarctica.

76. You brush ants off your bread and enjoy some lunch.

77. You start naming cockroaches and rats.

78. Your toiletries are labeled in five different languages.

79. Clean water becomes paramount. Hot water becomes trivial.

80. You open a travel magazine and find you’ve been to every place they’ve written an article about.

81. You stop noticing when cocktails are served without ice.

82. You become used to quaffing warm beer.

83. When you visit home, you listen to the radio for an hour before you recognize a song.

84. You can immediately tell the difference between someone from Denmark, Holland, Germany, Austria and Switzerland.

85. Military coups, riots, revolutions or wars don’t stop you from going anywhere.

86. You’ve watched Rocky IV dubbed into Russian.

87. You’ve been to the top of the five tallest buildings in the world.

88. You know the difference between Vietnamese and Thai food.

89. You’ve watched a lion take down a zebra.

90. You know the best cantina in Rio to get a steak.

91. You’ve eaten too many shrimp tacos.

92. You realize that there are fewer nations in South America than the former USSR, so you go to all of them too.

93. You’ve traveled from crown to cape of more than one continent.

94. You are able to sleep at any angle, temperature, time or place.

95. You wash clothes more quickly by hand than 1805 housewife.

96. On an average month you communicate more with gesticulations and facial expressions than words.

97. So much time goes by without a mirror; you’re flummoxed by your appearance.

98. You paid less than a dollar for your Ray Bans.

99. You’ve watched the same television show in over 10 countries.

100. You realize that most of the world is created in people’s minds.

101. And you still haven’t found what you are looking for.