Mojo's blog

B is for Bratwurst

Mojo — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 06:10:05 -0800

I've always wanted to wake up and find a beautiful woman in the kitchen, making me breakfast wearing nothing but a cute pair of cotton hipster panties and maybe one of my t-shirts.

On day two in Germany, I awoke in Sandy's living room and saw her standing in the kitchen, buttering my bread and...

A is for Arschloch

Mojo — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 16:45:11 -0800

The alphabet has been good to me:

I've been reading and writing for most of my life. I've received nourishment from the alphabet in both cereal AND soup form. One of my favourite television programs growing up, Sesame Street, was almost always brought to me by particular letters of the alphabet. And...

A Hallowe'en Miracle!

Mojo — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 17:22:02 -0800

I LOVE HALLOWE'EN!
Hallowe’en combines two of my favourite things in the whole world: Dressing up in costume and unnatural consumption of alcoholic beverages.

I usually start planning my getup around August. That’s not an exaggeration. Anyone can buy a Hallowe’en costume, but it takes time...

Back to the Gower

Mojo — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 12:03:54 -0700

When Doctor Emmett Brown's plutonium powered DeLorean DMC-12 reached 88 miles per hour it produced enough energy to activate the flux capacitor and travel through time.

I don't have a flux capacitor.
I certainly don't have any plutonium.
But on Sunday evening I went back in time in a blue Mazda 3, at...

Mojo: One with Nature

Mojo — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 06:55:41 -0700

There is a sign in my neighbourhood that reads "Swansea Vale Nature Reserve", and behind it, a path leading into the brush. Every time I pass that sign I'm overcome with curiosity, much like Alice when she stumbled across her rabbit hole. I want to know what's down that path, but I'm always on my way...

Foot Fetish

Mojo — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 08:00:23 -0700

I made a very groundbreaking discovery today: I don't hate soccer!

(For the rest of this post, 'soccer' will be referred to as 'football'... the actual name of the sport.)

I have tried to watch football on television before but I have trouble fully respecting a sport where falling down and...

Mojo: indie rock reporter

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:41:21 -0700

LIVE!

NUDE!

GIRLS!

I'm surrounded by an adult bookstore, a "Thai Massage" parlour that I'm almost certain specializes in more than just back rubs, scantily-clad women standing in doorways to places with names like "Twilight" and "Night Cap", and more neon signs than I've ever seen in my entire life....

Open to new experiences!

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:39:34 -0700

I answered a couple of ads the other day.

The first ad was from a band that has recently been signed to a record label here in the UK and is about to embark on a UK university tour. They are looking for someone to review their show this Wednesday for their press packet. The gig is at the world...

Coincidence?

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:37:49 -0700

Today, I met a girl and I found out that she likes Chuck Klosterman and debating. I have read two of Klosterman's books:

#1- Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs, which I thoroughly enjoyed.

#2- Killing Yourself to Live, the most self-indulgent vanity project I have ever read.

So, it was clear what...

Brighton and Back

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:35:43 -0700

Riding the train back from Brighton, I can hardly keep my eyes open.

I arrived in Brighton the day before at precisely 6:30pm. Will greeted me at the turnstile. At 6:35 we were in Grand Central, a pub, sipping back a couple of pints of fresh, cold joy. At approximately 4am we stumbled our way to...

The Day I Failed at Everything... (almost)

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:33:16 -0700

I waited around all day for my train tickets to be delivered. Finally, at about 3pm I called First Great Western to see what the deal was.

"Hi there. I'm taking the train to Brighton tomorrow, and my tickets haven't arrived yet."

The woman on the phone was a complete disaster. Through her broken...

Oslo: City of Love- Chapter III

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:31:18 -0700

The next morning I was alone in the garden house when there was a light knock at the door. Marie entered and sat next to me. For a brief moment I panicked. What if she didn't recall what happened last night? What if she did recall everything and thought it was a mistake! I took her hand and...

Oslo: City of Love- Chapter II

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:23:21 -0700

Our first stop was Marie's house. To drop off our bags and check out our new digs for the next two nights. Lee and I would be staying in the Garden House. That's right, the Garden House! Her family has an additional house in their garden. It's an adorable little red cottage that appears to be...

Oslo: City of Love- Chapter I

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:22:03 -0700

And then I held her in my arms one last time.

After a long embrace I gave her a kiss on the cheek and we said goodbye. Watching her drive off I could feel a piece of me leaving with her..............

Intense, eh? I know! It was an intense three days in Norway. Yes, thats right, I was in Norway....

The Stag

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:18:34 -0700

Wind Street. As in, “The Long and Winding Road”, not as in, “Dust in the Wind”. Wind Street is a marvelous stretch of road in Swansea that is almost nothing but pubs and clubs. The night begins as Jamie and I walk into Bank Statement. Formerly a bank (ahhhh, now you get it), this bar...

Croeso i Abertawe

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:16:00 -0700

September 2, 2008

4:45pm

I step down from the train and on to the platform. "Croeso i Abertawe," the sign reads: "Welcome to Swansea"!

4:51pm

"CHEERS!" Jamie and I touch glasses and I take a big swig of my first Welsh beer. Sitting across the table from my old mate is almost surreal. We've talked...

The Day I Raced the World

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:08:47 -0700

Lee and I slept in today. Had some cereal; Special K Oats & Honey (because they don't have Vector in the UK!!!!! Grrrrr...). Got organized and headed to the train station with Lee and his housemate Paul. My first time on the train! A beautiful blue and yellow train with comfortable crimson seats....

The Mile-High Blog Club

Mojo — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:04:54 -0700

The view from 35,000 feet:

I've never watched the sunrise from above the clouds before. Patches of orange break through at the horizon. The tangerine glow of the sky resembles what it looks like when there is a fire in the distance. "Here comes the sun, do dee do do, here comes the sun, I say,...

Terminally Blogging

Mojo — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 23:54:58 -0700

The average Boeing 747-300 (the plane I am flying in) weighs about 350,000 pounds. And it flies. Damn, airplanes are cool.

Sitting here in the terminal, looking at all of the other random travelers, I start to wonder what their stories are:

There is a young man with an oversized manilla envelope...